Just some thoughts..

Disclaimer: I'm sorry if any part of this entry sounds like i'm attacking anyone. It is really just a pure entry of my thoughts, and what i'm going through. If it offended you, i sincerely apologise.

I had wanted to blog about my TIC but i think i would only do that when i have gotten all the photos from my friends.

Read all the comments that had been left on my blog. First, i must say, i'm really touch for all your encouragement. However, I must emphasis that i'm not trying to outbeat someone else on who had it worst. I'm just ranting out what i cannot stand. Probably a bit over doing but hey! I have always say that my blog is my way out of my frustrations. So pardon me, if you cannot agree on what i'm saying. But then again, what is there to agree or disagree?

It's true that i can choose to be happy or choose to feel helpless. Maybe you won't believe it but i'd tried to choose to be positive about my working environment and workload. It is only when i really cannot take it, then i come to my blog to bitch about it. To me, it is a way out so that i can move on with my work again. I figure that it beats keeping within yourself till i explode.

Of course i'm not saying that the rest of you have it easy. Most of you probably are busy with one thing or another. I'm just saying that i'm unhappy about certain stuffs (which probably is the result of insufficient sleep as well). I just wish to have more time relating to teaching instead of doing stuffs which i dun see will be able to help my students. For your info, in my school, if a class do badly, it is always the teacher's fault. Whether you have enough time to do remedial with or not is irrelavant.

So pardon me, if this sounds selfish but i really wanna pass my probation. My classes weren't that fantastic to begin with (in fact, most teachers call them hopeless). If i dun have enough time for them, they aren't gonna pass. I have a heavy burden on my shoulder. I have to make my NA science class pass their science. Not very difficult you said. But consider this, only 30% just pass the subject in mid-year and my principal and subject head sort of hinted me that they wanna see me doing some results with them.

So, of course i'm furious when the oral thing takes away my curiculum time with them (i dun even have enough time to go through the topics with them, not to mention i HAVE to finsh with the SOW..). And of course, i will be furious when i dun have time to do remedial with them or to simply prepare for my lesson. And finally of course i will be furious when on top of all these, i have to come out with 'quality' test papers. I'm tired. I just wanna have a rest now. I so tired that i have trouble waking up in the morning.

It is not only physical tiring, it is stressful mentally also. Forgive me even though my 25 periods a week looks so much better than those who had 32 periods a week.

P/S: Just for info sake, i'm doing a form teacher stuffs even though i'm co-form in name because my mentor is just oh.. so busy. At least your fren get credits for what he does, J.